Scheduling Conflicts

“A life spent in constant labor is a life wasted, save a man be such a fool as to regard a fulsome obituary notice as ample reward.” ~George Jean Nathan, American drama critic and editor (1882-1958)

It had been one of those days when everyone seemed contentious. Constant interruptions prevented my getting any traction on my work projects and I kept finding small irritating mistakes. At 1:03 my boss called me from a meeting room where everyone was waiting…for me. My “Blackberry” indicated the meeting was at 3:00 not at 1:00. I left a colleague at the restaurant with cash to cover our lunches and rushed back to the office, reaching the meeting room by 1:15.

Upon arrival I was peppered with questions, the answers to which required the context of the conversation which had occurred before my arrival. The answers I gave were great; they just weren’t the answers to the questions they were asking. An hour and a half later I returned to the spot where I had hurriedly parked my car only to be greeted by a $60.00 parking ticket (street cleaning day).

The rest of my day went no better: coworkers were cranky, fellow staff members were uncooperative and none of the phone calls I received seemed to be things anyone else wanted to deal with. By 7:00 PM I decided to call it quits and go home. Traffic was heavier than usual and people seem ruder than usual. Or, was I just driving more aggressively than usual because of my mood?

I arrived home to find dinner waiting, as it always is, no matter how late I am. Still I sullenly stared at my plate, giving Teresa only single syllable responses to her friendly patter. Finishing dinner a little after 9:00 PM I trudged upstairs to bed. After my pre-bed ritual, I clicked off the light, said goodnight to my wife, pulled the blankets up to my chest and crossed my arms over top.

There I lay, staring holes into the darkness. It had been an awful day. Physically and emotionally spent, I was unable to sleep as my mind continued to whir, replaying the events of the day; only the bad ones of course.

Finally my thoughts slowly shifted to God and His apparent absence from my life. The usual thoughts banged about in my brain: Where’s God? Why isn’t He around when I need Him? Why does he seem so far away? What’s this stupid life of mine about anyway? I continued to “play the tapes” of my negative experiences over and over, wearing a groove in my head until my pessimistic litany put me to sleep. My last thought as I drifted off was: “God, please, just give me a hint.”

We live in troubling times. Though Wall Street is declaring victory those of us in the trenches still live in fear of our security, our livelihood and our jobs. The seemingly logical response is to overwork; to somehow justify ourselves by the level of effort we exert or the amount of hours we spend at work. Surely this will keep us safe and secure.

We must, however, learn to resist overwork. Aside from the fatigue and worry to which it leads it also damages our relationship with our family, our friends and our God. We chronic workaholics often wonder why our families and friends sometimes seem distant or why our lives seem out of sync with theirs. In point of fact building relationships takes time and effort. Time and effort we often expend on our jobs in our attempts to “build our careers”. How often do we find ourselves responding to a personal invitation with, “I can’t, I have to work.”

The same thing is true of our relationship with God. As I lay there that night, wondering where God had gone I neglected to realize God hadn’t gone anywhere. I had. God was there for me. It was my side of the relationship which had gone wanting. Just like the family and friends my work life had caused me to neglect and with which I had fallen out of sync, so had my relationship with God fallen out of sync.

Like my loving wife waiting for me at home, God is always there for us. The dinner is always on the table when we get there, but we need to make the effort, through being good stewards of our time, to constantly build our relationship with our God; To know Him as personally and intimately as we know (or should know) our family. Learn to distribute your life’s efforts and don’t worry…God’s already got you on his schedule.

Dear God: Teach me to be a good steward of my time on earth.

“One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.” ~Bertrand Russell, American logician and philosopher (1872-1970)


© 2011 James E. Carper. All rights reserved.

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